Sweetness To Leave The Not So Fun Stuff Behind

There’s been a lot of fun stuff happening lately… and some not so fun stuff too. I’ve really been lucky to have such amazing people in my life to help me through that not so awesome stuff.

Fun thing #1: Belmonte Raw with the ever fabulous Dani & Miranda. Those gals are just all kinds of awesometown. And Carol’s food is seriously some of my favourite fare in the city.

Fun thing #2: lying in parks reading books, a trip to the AGO for Picasso and gluten free vegan fare & mojitos on a patio in Kensington with someone who makes me smile.

Fun thing #3: a visit from my beautiful friend Rosie all the way from Chicago. That girl has been such a great source of support, laughter and encouragement and it was such a treat to have her here in the city. I can’t wait until she comes back and when I take a trip to Chicago to visit so we can talk more about the real meaning behind Moosehead…

Fun thing #4: new blog design by the amazing My Girl Thursday. Chantilly has been nothing but brilliant in this process. She’s creative, patient and thinks outside the box. I think what she’s come up with is absolutely beautiful and oh-so-me and I can’t wait for you to see it. New blog design also means a bit more direction on this blog and a whole lot more posting. I’ve been saving stuff for unofficial relaunch, so I guess that’s fun thing #4a.

Fun thing #5: discovering new music that makes me want to squeal with joy. I had planned to attend a show at the Drake a few weeks ago to support the oh-so-talented Paula Perri who was opening for a band called Pearl and the Beard, who I had never heard of. Paula just blew me away (as expected) and I decided to stick around and see what this trio was all about. They were wonderful!! Seriously sweet tunes, beautiful harmonies, interesting mix of instruments and fantastic banter and connection with the crowd. The whole night was stellar and I’m so happy I discovered some new music that I’ve been obsessed with ever since. They’re the best.

Fun thing #6: the lilacs are out. I love them.

Fun thing #7: singing my little heart out, learning new music, being inspired and meeting wonderful new people in Tracy Michailidis’ Songbook Lab. Tracy is a fantastic performer and a generous, warm, challenging teacher. It’s been a treat to be back in class with so many talented people and I can’t wait to take it again to keep working on my audition book.

Fun thing #8: by the time you read this, I’ll be on my way to NYC! (maybe I’ll find more men in uniform??) Last week when I got a notification that Jonathan Reid Gealt was hosting a master class along with people like Adam Guettel (responsible for brilliant musicals like Light in the Piazza and Floyd Collins) and Tituss Burgess (the man is incredible), I knew I had to be there. I emailed Jonathan right away and less than 10 minutes later I was planning a trip to New York. The weekend is going to kick my ass and frolicking in NYC is going to make my heart sing; I couldn’t be happier.

I’m not going to get into the less-than-fun stuff right now, and instead focus on all this sweetness and everything great that is to come as a result of some big changes. The always amazing Jessie helped me to write a list of good things to make me happy when we were together last week and a lot of things from this list were on there. I’ve been carrying the list around with me and glancing at it from time to time as a reminder of how many good/fun/awesome things I have to be thankful for right now. Big NYC post when I return!

Do One Thing That Scares You–52 Days Til Summer Week 2

Welcome to week 2!

So excited for everyone that has joined the challenge and hearing about everyone’s progress last week! I’ve had a lot of fun chatting with people on and offline about the whole thing and am so glad that the concept is resonating with people. Hearing all of your success is absolutely inspiring me!

This week’s challenge is going to push your limits – in the best possible way.

[source]

If you want results, you need to push yourself, so just get rid of the excuses and challenge yourself. Do one thing this week that scares you.

Now, I know you may be thinking, “Ashley, I just started with _____. I’m ______ and _______ and it’s going to take me a little while to get used to _______.”

Seriously.
Cut the BS and just do it.
Stop making excuses and just go for it.
How could you push yourself this week to help yourself reach your goals even faster?

Maybe it’s related to activity. Maybe it’s ridding yourself of a habit you can’t get rid of (caffeine, sugar, white flour etc). Maybe you’ve been thinking about cutting out meat or dairy or too many treats. Maybe it’s something you’ve wanted to try but haven’t. I know it’s only week #2, but why not make the next 44ish days the best they could possibly be? You can take this challenge however you wish, but I can’t wait to hear about how you’re pushing your limits in our check in on Friday.

This week: do something that scares you.

Life As a Process of Self Discovery

There have been many things that have been keeping me from blogging lately…

Getting ready for the next instalment of the Ashleyx2 cabaret

Ash and I are thrilled to be putting on another cabaret and this time it’s in celebration of our birthdays! (Mine is this Friday – more on the “birth week” to come!)

Getting cast in a show for the 2011 Toronto Fringe

We had the first read through last night and I’m excited to be a part of Fringe once again. The cast for Chicken Coop’s Cellar Hotel is really talented and the artistic team is bursting with passion and enthusiasm for the project. I love surrounding myself with creative people who love what they do as much as I do.

I’ve also found myself making my lunch more often… Raw Mexican inspired “rice” from Choosing Raw

Huge salads – some just created with whatever is in my fridge or inspired by great recipes, like the deconstructed sushi salad from Appetite for Reduction.

And why is this?
Well, I’m back in a 9-5 job.
Gah, I know.

It was a really tough decision, but it needed to be done. While my year and 3 months away from the office world was amazing, I just couldn’t continue to live the way I was living. I was becoming burnt out in my crazy all-over-the-place schedule, going broke, and as a result was unable to do all the things that I want to do. Going back to work 9-5 is allowing me the flexibility to travel; I’m finally going to get to NYC in the fall. Newfoundland, Montreal, somewhere hot and Europe are also on my must-go list in the next 12 months. It’s also allowing me to re-enrol in school, so I’ll probably be taking at least one more class before the summer is over.

There was part of me that struggled with going back to work because I felt like I was failing. I had decided that 9-5 wasn’t for me and that I was going to step outside the box and create my own schedule and do all the things that I love to do. I absolutely did that and loved it all. I had an amazing year in 2010 and if I could I would continue on that path… but it just wasn’t sustainable.

Working 9-5 still allows me the flexibility to do a lot of things that I love:

• perform – as seen by the 2 shows I mentioned at the beginning of this post. I’ll also be singing in another cabaret on May 1st as well as a corporate gig on May 3 and have aspirations to audition for everything and anything I can
• work for Weight Watchers – which I had to give up my daytime meetings (and I miss my members a lot!!) I still have my Wednesday and Saturday meetings… and to be honest it feels a lot less like work. Even one of my receptionists commented that I had a different energy in my meetings. While I always enjoyed my meetings, it’s back to feeling like that little thing that I do on the side and no longer feels like a job.
• go back to school – I can pay tuition again, so I’ll be finishing my designation in the evenings
• take care of me – my schedule was kind of erratic and stability means I generally eat lunch at the same time each day. I have time to hit the gym in the morning or after work

Last month I totally rocked on the activity front and I can’t wait to do it again in April. I’m working on feeling great and hitting the gym and eating well is a really important part of that. I’ve also been attending a weekly Weight Watchers meeting as a member. Yes, I know the topic and the leader and many of the things we’re discussing should be second nature, but it’s really true that people who attend Weight Watchers meetings lose 3 times more weight than people who go at it alone. It has become an important time for me to focus on where I want to be and spend time with some amazing and motivating friends. It’s also great to see Lindsay in action!

Looking for a job is a full-time job and I was just really lucky that there were some incredible opportunities out there that were a great fit for me and my skill set. (If you’re looking for a job, check out sites like Work in Culture, Media Job Search Canada and Charity Village for jobs you’re not going to find on the more traditional job search sites) I started looking and submitting my resume on February 24, was offered a job on March 11 and started on March 14!!

I’m back in an executive assistant role in a fantastic office downtown. The people in my office are awesome (especially the girls I sit with), I’m enjoying random lunch and tea dates with friends in offices nearby and I can’t wait to start riding my bike to the office in the summer.

I’ve been so much less stressed in the past few weeks, and the way everything fell into place, I realized that this is the right decision for me right now. I feel a lot happier and a lot more balanced than I have in a long time.

I’m also hoping that being in a more regular schedule is going to allow me to blog some more… because I know I’ve been neglecting this because I just haven’t had the time! Coming up in the month of April I’ll be posting about my birthday week festivities, the Ashleyx2 cabaret, and a sweet giveaway and product review that I’m really excited about!!

What are you excited about in April? How do you remain flexible and kind to yourself with changes that may occur in your life?

Juicy, Exciting, Positive Intentions for 2011

This post has been a few weeks in the making, mostly because I’ve been busy with my latest show,  doing lots of PR for Weight Watchers (appearing in the Globe and Mail, Metro and on Rogers daytime tv making baked falafels) and generally finding some calm in my chaos.

I’ve done some reflecting on my 2010 goals and despite it being a challenging year in many ways, I am really proud of all that I accomplished. Here is a recap of my goals and my current thoughts on how I fared.

• Taking care of myself by eating well, tracking, drinking tea, sleeping, practicing yoga, spending time with friends, singing, writing, dancing and working out

I would be lying if I said I found this easy to do this year. While I feel really healthy and my Crohn’s is still in check, I struggled to find balance and a happy place for myself amid everything that I do. I did spend time eating well, tracking, drinking tea, sleeping, practicing yoga, seeing friends, singing, writing, dancing and working out, but probably could have focused more on eating well, sleeping and finding balance.

• Taking advantage of my education and being an active participant in my classes

School was incredible, but after I started to become apathetic about it, decided to take some time away. I was so enthusiastic in the beginning, but realized that performing was where my heart was and decided to take some time off. This has been an amazing decision and I look forward to going back at some point to obtain my designation as a holistic nutritionist.

• Helping even more members reach their goals with Weight Watchers, including getting to Lifetime

Leading up to 10 meetings each week has been absolutely amazing and in the past 8 weeks I’ve been able to be a part of the media buzz surrounding PointsPlus. I absolutely love our new program and am so happy to have helped even more people reach their weight loss goals in 2010.

• Journaling regularly, writing a book, blogging regularly and exploring other writing opportunities

Um… didn’t really do very well on this front. I’m so happy to have had my blog as an outlet, but it took a bit of a backseat in my life. Did some journaling but like my blog posts, they were sporadic epic updates!!

• Raising a minimum $2,500 for the Toronto Heel n Wheel a Thon and continuing to raise awareness of IBD through my role as Honorary Chair and fun initiatives on the blog

I raised $3,000 for the Heel n Wheel a thon and was able to raise more awareness of IBD as Honorary Chair and through my blog.

• Giving my all in my performing career through my upcoming role in REX, getting new headshots and actively auditioning for awesome roles

I’m really happy with all the shows I did in 2010, and the realization that performing is what I want to be doing with my life right now. I had so much fun with REX, got new headshots and through some great auditions, landed some pretty awesome roles. I was inspired by many things and some delightful people and couldn’t be happier to head into 2011 with my career as a performer at the top of my priority list.

With all of that in mind, I’m sticking with my go big or go home motto for 2011:

• Perform more than ever, get an agent and get paid to do what I love
• Produce the second instalment of the Ashleyx2 cabaret
• Find peace in my body image while eating well, exercising, sleeping and taking care of me
• Travel

2010 was a year of transition and change in so many ways and I believe that everything I did set me up for success this year. I’m so excited for what is to come!! I’m kicking off the year with a great show, some delightful reading material to keep me inspired (Getting Kris Carr’s Crazy Sexy Diet later this week and have already started Alicia Silverstone’s Kind Diet, Meghan’s 21 Days to Health) and getting on those goals of mine. I’m also loving this quote I found the other day:

"The hardest thing in the world is convincing other people to love the same thing you do. But the fact that it's hard does not diminish your love – it must not. You go on loving that thing because, even if it's naïve, even if it's foolish, even if it's wrong, you believe in the very marrow of your bones that you will be able to convince them, eventually, some time. That certainty, that passion is too valuable to surrender in the face of resistance. You may not have convinced them yet; you will."  

~Jason Robert Brown

2011 is going to be a fantastic year. I can feel it.

Looking back on 2010, what are you proud of?
What are your goals in 2011 and how are they coming along so far?

I Can’t Remain Quiet (Video of the Cabaret Included)

It started with a text message…

Ashley and I had been talking about putting on a cabaret for a few months and an innocent text message that I sent to her that read “I guess there’s just something about Ashley” became the catalyst for our show. It was that text that catapulted us into action and the planning began. Ashley and I have been friends since our musical theatre school days, but became really close after running into one another on the subway a few years ago. We have since worked on two shows together and have become one another’s confidantes in life, but especially in our performing careers. We started planning our show extensively while on vacation together this summer. We came back with two very long to-do lists, song ideas and some great story-telling material for the cabaret itself and got moving. We started working with our pianist extensively in September and worked our butts off to get the show together.

There’s a lot of amazing contemporary musical theatre out there that Ash and I were dying to sing. Composers like Kerrigan & Lowdermilk, Scott Alan, Jonathan Reid Gealt, and Kooman & Dimond are making beautiful music and telling amazing stories that need to be told and we were thrilled to have the platform to do just that. It was so fun to put together our set list with songs that showcased our voices and personalities, but also told the story of what it’s like to be an Ashley. This year has provided me with some pretty exciting performance opportunities. I didn’t think I could top the high that I had reached after meeting Sheldon Harnick whilst doing REX in Feburary or the experience of my first Fringe this summer, but putting together our cabaret was absolutely phenomenal. I felt so inspired, every single day, and it absolutely solidified my love for performing and being onstage.

Last Thursday I practically jumped out of bed, ready for our big day. After one final rehearsal we prepared to hit the stage. I was giddy.

We hit the stage and it was magical. We had a great audience of people from many different parts of our lives who were incredibly appreciative of all that we did. Ash and I had planned some little bits of banter which flowed smoothly (much to the audience’s delight) and our songs and harmonies were totally there. I left the stage at the end of the show on a total high. I was so proud of the work I had put out which was reciprocated by the audience’s reaction. The show was followed by a pretty amazing after party and I had a wonderful night mingling with our friends and supporters while dancing and indulging in the Ashleyx2 drink special. I left the party feeling excited, proud, giddy and most of all INSPIRED. The show reiterated for me that I need to be performing and often. So I’m working to make that happen.

In the meantime here’s a video of me singing “Quiet” by Jonathan Reid Gealt at the show.

It’s funny because I originally chose this song just because I loved it; It sat nicely in my voice, the lyrics were great and it fit right into the show. But once we got into rehearsals, the sentiment of the song started to resonate in various areas of my life and by the time I sang it on Thursday it had taken on a whole new meaning. Amazing.

I’m so thankful to have had such an incredible opportunity to perform so beautiful material with one of my favourite people. The show has left me feeling so inspired to perform and put myself out there and for the first time since musical theatre school, I truly feel ready to do so. Thank you to everyone who came and watched… and if you missed it, I’m sure it won’t be the last! I’m excited to see what opportunities the future brings…

There’s Just Something About Ashley

This week is epic and I’m absolutely thrilled.

Today I’ll be in school, then in rehearsal then heading to Curtains Down for a little open mic fun and promotion of our cabaret.

On Tuesday I will spend the day working, preparing and rehearsing for RENT in the evening.

On Wednesday I have a VERY BIG audition that I’m super excited for.

Thursday is the day I’ve been waiting oh-so-patiently for…

Exciting days ahead!!

And proper blog entries to come… I promise!!

When Life Sends You Lemons, Kiss Goats

Yesterday was not one of my best days. It started off well:
Woke up around 9:00.
Made a smoothie (banana, blueberries, spinach, soy, spirulina)
Biked to the gym.
Went for a 30 minute run & BodyFlow class.
Biked home and prepped lunch for my picnic in the park with Lindsay.

So far so good, right?

Lunch was brilliant. I made rice paper veggie wraps and carrot slaw with mango chutney dressing. Lindsay brought an amazing quinoa tabbouleh. I wasn’t having a great day emotionally and Lindsay and I had a pretty intense conversation about life, habits, body image and all kinds of good stuff. I love her to death and am so happy to have such a beautiful friend to share my innermost thoughts with.

When I got home, I noticed that there was a piece of mail waiting for me on the dining room table. Something told me it was the letter that I had been waiting for over the last couple of weeks. In June I applied for the UCBeyond Scholarship.

UCB Canada, a division of UCB Inc., is dedicated to creating unique programs and tools to aid Crohn’s disease (CD) patients in reaching above and beyond the boundaries of their disease and fulfilling their educational ambitions. This award is a one-time scholarship of up to $5,000.00 CAN. In 2010, eight (8) scholarships will be awarded to individuals diagnosed with CD.

When I had learned about the scholarship, I was jumping for joy. $5,000 would cover the remainder of my tuition and books for school and would relieve me of a great deal of financial stress. It seemed like an amazing gift from the universe and I was determined to win. It was a fairly extensive application but I gathered all of the necessary components, including 2 fantastic references from 2 trusted, influential people who I have worked with very closely.

“Ashley has turned the challenges she faces with Crohn’s into opportunities. She takes a passionate and enthusiastic approach to all that she does, while ensuring that she stays true to a message of ‘Crohn’s won’t get the best of me, I will get the best of me.’ Rather than letting her symptoms slow her down, they have actually helped fuel her interest in nutrition – a subject she is now pursuing with formal education.”

“Ashley carries with her a dynamic energy and charisma that is absolutely infectious. Her personal story is one of the most inspiring I have come to know. After overcoming a challenge with her weight, to then be diagnosed with Crohnʼs disease, might be enough to discourage anyone that the path to health could be found through healthy eating. Ashley however, believed that the changes she had already made, only prepared her to go a step further and through her efforts and attitude is living symptoms free.

Simply helping herself, would not fit with Ashleyʼs inherent generosity and giving nature. It took much strength, confidence and bravery to leave her place of full-time employment to embark on her formal nutrition education. She made the transition with, what I have come to know, in her normal fashion- with spark, enthusiasm, dynamism and unwavering commitment.”

I got the information required from my school, gastroenterologist and worked really hard on my one page essay, telling my story of diagnosis, treatment, and new life. I felt confident sending in the application and was anxiously waiting to hear back from the committee sometime in mid August.

Well yesterday was that day. And I didn’t win one of the 8 scholarships. I was speechless.

I had been thinking nothing but positive thoughts about the scholarship; I was so proud of my application; I had so many amazing people supporting me, but alas it was not enough.

After a lot of crying and hugs from Lindsay and my roommates, I just wanted to curl up in a ball and hide from the world for awhile. Sometimes I just need to do that, but instead I remembered that wallowing really isn’t my style and that Lindsay wouldn’t care if I cried for the entire duration of our walk. So we walked and ended up in Riverdale Farm.

As much as I had wanted to hide from the world for a little bit, the walk, sunshine, adorable animals and amazing friendship was exactly what I needed. We continued our walk all the way to the Annex where I met up with other friends and ended up having a great evening, despite how I was feeling on the inside.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t upset about the scholarship. It would have taken away some definite financial stress and enabled me to continue moving forward without having to worry about tuition or books, making my life a little bit easier. That being said, I know that it’s not the end of the world and that I will continue to “keep on keepin’ on”. I was going to go to school without the scholarship so I’m confident that I’ll figure it out. I’m constantly thankful for this amazing life that I’m living, and you really can’t put a monetary value on that.

This morning I reread my scholarship application, and I’m still really proud of all the work that I put into getting to where I am today:

While there have been moments in my life where my disease has been an issue, it has been more of a blessing than any sort of misfortune. I feel that I have struck a beautiful balance of things in my life that I love (nutrition, helping others and performing), and I now feel healthier than ever. By writing about my experience on my blog and through my role as Honorary Chair, I have been able to share this inspirational and uplifting story of health, balance and happiness with others. My education in holistic nutrition is going to empower me to inspire and help even more people, and this scholarship would allow me to do that without financial concern. My life has changed instrumentally since being diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I have worked incredibly hard to get to where I am today, and look forward to what the future holds for me.

Scholarship or not, I’m truly excited for the future.

Enough is Enough

On Sunday night I found myself sitting down overlooking the beautiful Toronto skyline reflecting on my feelings. I had just had a great catch-up with the beautiful and insightful Lindsay, had enjoyed an amazing weekend and had spent some time journaling whilst reading Love Your Body, Love Your Life.This week has been the first week in months where I have actually had a bit of down time and I guess that has led to my self reflection and in some cases self deprecation. While rationally, I’m incredibly proud of how far I’ve come and the great life I’ve created for myself, I still find myself struggling to be at peace with the body I’m inhabiting.

But Ashley, weren’t you finding your way through these feelings a few months ago? Aren’t you feeling good and defining yourself by more than just the number on the scale?

Well, yes. And no.

There are moments when I don’t feel at peace. I feel like there’s a part of me that can never be “enough”. A big part of me just wants to feel adequate and lately I’ve been struggling to find that for myself.

I was reading through an old journal from last year and found an entry I had written around the time I was finishing boot camp. Even though I was in amazing shape, it wasn’t enough somehow. I still wanted to lose a few more lbs and couldn’t be happy with the way I looked, despite feeling physically strong, toned and really proud of all that I had accomplished.

I found another journal from earlier this year when I had lost some weight following my break up. I was at the lowest weight of my life, but still didn’t feel good about it because I wasn’t happy with how I had gotten there and recognized that I was too thin. While I already knew it deep inside, I learned that a low number on the scale didn’t mean instant happiness. Imagine that.

On the flip side of things, there are moments when I feel amazing:

During/after a really great workout
When I plan my meals and make great food choices
Wearing a bikini at the pool on Saturday
During my belly dance recital or even just in class
Most days.

I’ve realized that I start to freak out a little when I’m stressed about other things, upset about a certain situation or just generally overwhelmed. I have started to see a pattern in Ashley-meltdown land and know that if I’m overworked and under-rested and without groceries or a meal plan in sight, I will probably freak out within a few days.

Yesterday I went to see my gastroenterologist for a check up. It has been a year since I last saw him, and I can’t tell you how amazing it was to hear the words “You seem to be doing fine without me, I’ll see you in a year unless there is a problem”. I have worked so hard to be as healthy as I am and it felt so good to be sitting in that room on the other side of this disease. The side filled with energy, vitality, strength and without pain, anger or a need for hardcore medication or surgery.

It made me grateful for where I am today, regardless of how I feel about my body. This is what I believe in: achieving great health and being my best me. The other stuff is frivolous and I know I need to work past it.

I’m beginning to realize that my definition of “enough” is changing. I am more than enough and I’m tired of treating my body with such disrespect and anger when I’ve really achieved an ultimate goal, so much more important than the number on the scale or the size of the skirt I’m wearing. I know that I believe that there is so much more to this journey than just the eating right, the exercise and the number on the scale, it just sometimes takes a bit of time to put that into perspective and really live it.

It’s been four years since I started my weight loss journey and looking back I can see how far I have come. I see the small victories I have had and the milestones I have hit along the way. Despite a Crohn’s diagnosis, I feel healthier than I ever have before. I am so happy in the life that I am living and am surrounded by some pretty amazing people. I have so many things to feel joyous about in this life and I know that as I continue to work through this aspect, I will find peace here too. Enough is enough; I am ready to move forward.

Part of the book includes a section on setting intentions and as a result I made a list of intentions for myself. A second part of the exercise is to flip the list around so that it is stated in the present. Here goes nothing:

I am beautiful.
I am comfortable in my skin.
I am healthy.
I am loved.
I am happy.
I am at peace.
I am stable.
I am strong and toned.
I am a role model.
I nourish my body.
I am getting the most out of life.

I am enough.

World Cup – Then And Now

Then – June 2006 (Melly & I - Hannover, Germany)

• On 3 week whirlwind Euro-trip through England, Scotland, Ireland and Germany with best friends
• Had taken all of my 3 weeks of vacation time from my job as a receptionist to take the trip. Meant no time off at Christmas or other holidays until the following year.
• Watched a preliminary World Cup match (Italy vs. Ghana) in Hannover and saw many other games broadcasted throughout Europe
• Living at home with my dad and brother.
• Good support network of friends and family.
• Not feeling so great about my body. A director had asked me to lose 15 lbs for a role in the fall and I nearly told him where to shove it… while starting to doubt myself all the same.
• Finding a balance between working full time and doing shows
• Eating whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I was not one to deprive myself of anything and Europe was a great example of that as I enjoyed the spicy fries in the grease-laden transparent paper cone and dessert at restaurants practically every night.

Now – July, 2010(Melly & I – Toronto, Ontario) 

• In the midst of Fringe, enjoying school and work and spending time with friends. Every afternoon at 2pm kinda feels like a vacation because nothing really feels like work and I love everything that I’m doing when I’m supposedly “working”. Such a drastic change from being at a desk 9-5..
• Watched the World Cup final with Melly and her old roommates after catching a Fringe show
• Living with 3 awesome roommates in a house that I love.
• Amazing support network of friends, classmates, mentors and people who inspire me.
• Feeling better about my body. The last few months have definitely been a big transition for me but I’m starting to find that groove again and almost feel back to where I would like to be. Have worked over the last 4 years to lose 30 lbs and keep it off.
• Have struck an amazing balance between work and play. Truly thriving in my life as a student, Weight Watchers Leader and actor, and feel like I have a great synergy between the three. Now that things have slowed down even more so, there is even more “me” time in sight and look forward to what’s to come this summer.
• Eating mindfully as a gluten-free vegan Weight-Watchin’ gal. This summer I want to re-evaluate my diet based on some things that I’ve been learning in school and ensure that I’m getting a good balance of foods and macronutrients. I feel so healthy eating this way, and am still able to make room for treats (like delightful mango-raspberry gelato from Summers)

At that World Cup game four years ago, I never would have imagined that I would end up here in 2010. I was reminded of this experience by Meghan’s post on “Becoming Who I Needed to Meet” last week and evaluating my greatest life changes from four years ago.

Someone mentioned to me yesterday that they had felt inspired by my actions of late and that I was just doing what I wanted to be doing without worrying about the “5 year plan”. I responded by saying that five years from now I just want to be happy. I think that’s probably what I wanted for myself back in 2006 as well, but at the time I didn’t know what the source of that happiness was going to be nor what it was going to look like.  I never would have dreamed it would be living this life that I currently lead and that’s fine by me.

Isn’t it wonderful to be where you are, when you imagine where you’ve come from? ~Byron Katie

How has life changed for you over the last four years? Where do you see yourself in the future?

Heel ‘n’ Wheel-A-Thon in T-Minus 2 Days

The big day is just around the corner! I can hardly believe that it’s been a full year since the last time I did the event. At that time, it had still been less than a year that I had been diagnosed and was still working to figure this all out. So much has changed in a year, but I’m proud to say that I feel even healthier than I did at last year’s event and I am so excited to continue to head in that direction.

I hope that as a result of being the Honorary Chair and sharing my story that I’ve raised some awareness about the prevalence of IBD in our society. IBD affects more than 200,000 Canadians with more than 9,200 cases each year, but somehow before I was diagnosed I didn’t know anything about it. I want people to realize that they can speak up about this disease and that there are options out there. I realize that I’ve taken a bit more of an “unconventional” path to healing (not just medication and surgery but with primarily food!), but it has worked wonders and I’m so happy that I feel as healthy as I do today. Join me this Sunday in Sunnybrook Park at 10 am for the annual Heel ‘n’ Wheel-a-thon!

My New Pie Of Life

Almost exactly a year ago I wrote a post about the effect of being part of Generation Y and the various components of my life. I used a pie chart to illustrate the main segments of my life and alluded to some of the changes that I was looking ahead to in the future. At that time I still believed I would wait for more than a year to go to school rather than quit my job in November and start school in January. I can’t believe that I thought I would wait so long AND do it in the evenings and miss out on performing for two years.

In the last 6 months I’ve come to realize how amazing it is to have a balance of things that you love in your life. Quitting my job was one of the best things I ever did and every day I am so thankful for this dream life that I am living. My new pie of life goes something like this:My job no longer consumes half my life and my new work doesn’t usually feel like work because it’s Weight Watchers and I adore it! I am so pleased with the balance between work, school and play. I also have more time to perform, audition and be on stage which makes me really happy!! For the first time since musical theatre school I really feel like I’m thriving in this regard and have time to actually work on my craft (rather than squeeze it in between everything else that I’m doing)

My new pie of life was demonstrated on Friday within a chaotic, but successful day. Normally on Fridays I lead 1 meeting in the morning and then have the rest of the day to myself. This Friday was an exception due to the fact that I had a one-off Friday class and one night only show in the evening. Add to that some pretty amazing people and some yummy food, and it meant that basically everything I love was wrapped up into a single day!!

With everything going on, I went prepared with breakfast, lunch and snacks Quinoa flakes with apple & cinnamon for brekkie, spinach salad with tempeh & balsamic/flax dressing plus a banana, orange, blueberries & carrots with hummus.

I led a great little meeting and then rushed off to school for my second to last class of Advanced Nutritional Research. I was stoked when we got our marks back for the test we had written on Wednesday and when our teacher let us out early – success! It meant that I had more time to get down to Buddies in a Bad Times theatre for the tech rehearsal for Cabaret for a Cause 11. Tech went off without too many problems and it was good to sing through the group numbers with everyone. We were singing some great group songs like “All the Men in my Life Keep Getting Killed by Candarian Demons” from Evil Dead the musical, “Seasons of Love” from Rent, and Lilly Allen’s “Not Fair”. Once everything was good to go we all went for sushi. I shared some edamame and veggie rolls with Lindsay and our musical director.  I loved the little mushroom ones – so good!  With our tummies full of sushi goodness we were ready for a great show.  For my solo I sang a really fun song called My Party Dress. (Seen here performed by the lovely Jenni Barber) It went over really well!! Lindsay and I also performed the super fun duet “What is this Feeling?” from the musical Wicked. Lindsay sang the Elphaba role and her witches’ hat made me laugh so much. She is such a good friend, it was really hard for us to hate one another!! The whole evening was a great success and I had a lot of fun being onstage with an amazing group of talented people AND finally having an opportunity to sing with Linz. I practically fell into bed at the end of the night (especially since I was getting early up to lead 3 meetings in the morning) but it was such a wonderful day that I didn’t really care. It was a great reflection of my new pie of life and I couldn’t be happier that it contained so many of my favourite things.

So far this year I’ve realized that having such a balance of things in my life makes me really happy. It shouldn’t be rocket science, right? Do things that you love. Cut out the stuff you don’t. Live in the moment and pursue things that you feel passionately about. My pie of life kind of rocks and I look forward to continuing to live it on a daily basis.

Have you examined your pie of life lately? What’s there that makes you really happy? What’s missing? What can you do to change that?