Happy Christmas Eve! Here’s my second annual holiday video (here is last year’s video!)
Part two will be next week where I will discuss the year that has passed, goals and looking ahead to 2011!! Next week I’ll also be blogging about my delicious dinner with Nicole and Meghan – along with an awesome recipe for Nicole’s butternut squash soup.
For my WW members, here’s where I will be/won’t be next week:
Saturday Dec 25 – Carrot Common is closed
Wednesday Dec 29 – Church of the Holy Trinity is closed
Thursday Dec 30 – Forest Hill Loblaws, meeting at 9:30
Friday Dec 31 – Church of the Redeemer, meeting at 9:00
Saturday Jan 1 – Carrot Common is closed
If you can’t make it to one of my meetings, check out the Weight Watchers site for other meetings that are open over the holidays.
I’m so excited to get away from the city and my busy busy schedule for a bit of a break. I’m also excited for all that is to come in 2011. Happy Christmas to those of you who are celebrating!! I hope you have a wonderful holiday and look forward to seeing you soon!
Long time, no see.
Last week I started to repost some of my posts from Crohn’s Week last year. In the 2 years since my diagnosis, so much has changed and it was great to recount the story of my diagnosis. I started to prepare the latter half of the Crohn’s weeks posts for you, but realized that many of them were less accurate and relevant than they were this time last year so I decided against it.
I’ve been supremely busy this month and a lot of it has had to do with being in transition and making lots of changes in my life. I really thought that when I quit my job last year, I had figured out what I wanted to be doing in my life and had developed a formula for my perfect pie of life. I’ve come to realize over the course of the last year that this year was much more of a transition year than a destination than I had previously thought.
This year, I’ve had some amazing opportunities in the performing world. Through REX, my first Fringe show, the Ashley cabaret, other performances and auditions I’ve really realized that performing is what I wish I could do all the time. I feel alive onstage and nothing else fills me with the same energy, passion and love. Don’t get me wrong… Weight Watchers is still amazing and I’m having a blast leading 9 meetings a week, but it’s just not what I want to be doing forever.
This realization meant that some things in my life needed to change, so I decided to take some time off school. In my last class, I really wasn’t giving it my all and that really isn’t like me. I knew that I was going to have November off based on class availability, but after some soul searching and a lot of tears I decided that my heart really wasn’t there and the best decision would be to take some time off.
Leaving school was incredibly hard and I felt like a really big failure. I felt like I had made all of these life changes in order for me to go to school and then was going to cop out by leaving my program. I went back and forth for awhile, but knew what I needed to do after I started bawling when my grandmother asked me the question “Are you happy?” in a conversation over the phone.
Leaving school has allowed me to place greater emphasis on my performing career which has been really great. I’ve been doing lots of singing (including a performance at a celebration of Danielle’s life), enjoyed a great run of RENT
With all that has been going on, I’ve really been struggling with my eating and my weight. I’m still happily gluten free and vegan (with my Crohn’s still lying low!!), but just haven’t had the time to eat at home, prepare meals, exercise or go grocery shopping. Since getting to goal in 2007, I have comfortably maintained my weight with some ups and downs along the way. I’ve talked about maintenance as well my own struggles, feelings and emotions more than ever this year and I’ve really felt it in the last couple of months. After 2 huge breakdowns with my Weight Watchers manager and personal trainer, I finally feel like I’m in control of the situation again. The reality is that I’ve gained a few pounds and do not feel good about it. I’m eating well and exercising and feel confident that I can regain that good feeling I once had. I know that my hard work is going to pay off and I’m really excited.
I feel like blogging and blog-reading has really taken a back seat in my life and am working on making it come back! I would love to post some meals, some reviews and my thoughts on the new Weight Watchers plan (which launches in Canada next week!!) The holidays are just around the corner and I would love to do some blogging on preparing for the holidays as well. Despite not being in school, I feel like time to myself is less than ever, but am working on achieving a balance of everything.
I look back at where I was this time last year and am so amazed at all the changes that my life has undergone. I’m not exactly where I thought I would be, but I’m a much happier person, which is all that I can ask for. I’m so excited for 2011 and all of its potential!!
On Sunday night I ended up having an intense discussion with a friend about our shared experiences with the loss of a parent. We talked about grief and how it affected everyone differently and about how we had coped with loss following our parents' death. It was refreshing to speak with someone who could relate so closely to my own experience and felt more deeply connected to him as a result.
On Monday morning I was flooded with a wave of grief as I learned of the passing of a friend who had attended theatre school with me. I met Danielle in 2003 when I started at theatre school. 
It was prior to her fifth term show that Danielle was first diagnosed with leukemia. It came as a shock to everyone and her classmates surrounded her with love and light to help her persevere. Filled with positivity, hope, and being the spunky fighter she was, she kicked the leukemia in the ass, regained much of her health and re-enrolled in school as soon as she could to finish her studies. She graduated alongside her new class and was truly an inspiration to everyone.
Then Danielle got sick again.
Never a quitter, Danielle maintained an optimistic attitude and continued to amaze and inspire all of us with her courageous spirit. A bone marrow transplant was going to save Danielle's life and a wave of relief spread across our community when a match was found. We were confident that this was the end of the unnecessary fighting and that beautiful Danielle was going to be able to move forward with her life and career as a dynamic performer.
The last time I saw Danielle was in August at a dear friend's surprise birthday party. She looked so happy and beautiful and was bursting at the seams with love for life. We talked about the classes she was getting back into, the new headshots she was going to take. She was incredibly enthusiastic about the Ashleyx2 cabaret and said she couldn't wait to be there and that she felt inspired by us and all that we were doing. I gave her a big hug when she was leaving and told her how much I was looking forward to seeing her new headshots and having her at the show.
It was soon after I saw her, that Danielle got sick again. She was always updating her facebook with her progress and I noticed over the last couple weeks that those updates had ceased. More messages were showing up on her wall to keep fighting and on Friday I was chatting with a friend about the situation who told me that while she was in a coma she was doing better every day.
On my way to school on Monday morning I received a text message from my best friend to tell me that Danielle had passed away. I was shocked and incredibly sad. It didn’t even make sense to me. Monday was a very sad day, but also really beautiful in the way that our whole school community came together to share love, hugs, and beautiful memories of our gorgeous friend who had touched our lives so deeply.
In my WW meetings this week I’m talking about the importance of celebrating and positivity in one’s weight loss journey and have shared the following quote to end off each meeting: 
~Janet Jackson, Together Again
Happy Thanksgiving to my fellow Canadians! I hope you had a great 
I am thankful for my beautiful friends and family with whom I had the pleasure of spending a lot of quality time with this weekend. I neglected to take a ton of pictures of my beautiful walk through our neighbourhood with Nicole (my new roommate!), but managed to snap a photo of our delicious almond chai lattes from Broadview Espresso.
The Ashleyx2 adventures continued with a matinee of Banana Shpeel on Saturday.
We had a lot of fun at the show. The sets, costumes and lighting were breathtaking, the featured performers were ridiculously talented and the ensemble were awesome too. We had fabulous seats and truly enjoyed ourselves. Cirque du Soleil is pretty amazing…
Both shows left me wanting more and feeling inspired to come home and work on my own art. I want to be performing more and more these days and I feel so blessed to be surrounded by so many talented people to influence my art.
It goes without saying that I’m thankful for my health, and one of the reasons for the way that I feel is how I eat! Gluten-free vegan living is so normal to me now and I was thankful to enjoy some delightful fall/Thanksgiving inspired treats this weekend including Fitnessista pumpkin chocolate chip muffins 
It was such a great weekend and demonstrated that I have a lot to be thankful for on top of a pretty amazing year… what are you thankful for?
