Sunday Diaries

 

It's been a week. I mean, I guess the same could be said for all of 2020?

I've found taking walks to be a critical part of my self care during these last few months. On days when I feel anxious or sad or distressed, I've found getting out of the house to be a boost to my mood. I have a few different routes and a couple of destinations that feel safe. There have definitely been days where my walks have gone on for longer than I anticipated and I've received texts or calls from Paul to ensure I'm alright.

On Wednesday I took one of these walks and listened to this podcast. This episode of Lessons Learned with Komal was all about learning to celebrate your wins, no matter how big or small. And learning to celebrate the wins along the way (and not just after you reach the goal / the things happens / the milestone is accomplished). I found myself listening and nodding enthusiastically and by the end tears were streaming down my face because it was the message I needed to hear.

Celebrating my wins isn't something I excel at. And when I do manage to celebrate them, I'm not great at basking in the glory of that win - I can often be on to the next thing, or find a way to criticize or downplay myself. I'm so proud of the life I've built and things that I've accomplished/done along the way, but for some reason celebrating that often feels difficult. I think some of this comes from a mentality of "this is just what you do" which is something that I've felt for as long as I can remember. Sometimes I'll downright downplay things that have happened, the work I've done or what I've accomplished. Even now I wanted to put accomplished in quotation marks - this stuff runs deep. I'm working on it. 

In the podcast, Komal encouraged listeners to journal their wins, both throughout the process and at the end. I took this message to heart and went home after my walk and made a list of things that I could celebrate from the last few months. 2020 doesn't feel much like a year worth celebrating, but upon reflection I've had some wins along the way. I'm trying to give those wins some space and hold onto the good feelings that come alongside them. As I said, this podcast was the thing I needed to hear this week and I'm thankful that the message came through loud and clear at the perfect moment. 

As I write this, I'm celebrating the small win of celebrating my wins. A bit meta, but it's a big thing for me. I'd love to hear about your wins. Know I'm always here to celebrate with you!

image via @lessonslearned.co Instagram

Sunday Diaries

I got a haircut yesterday for the first time since February. It's amazing how much I've missed this small act of self care during this time. My hair was also beginning to feel like Joseph's Technicolor Dreamcoat because it was red and orange and gold and brown and grey... It's also the longest my hair has been in five years since I got my pixie cut. I'm feeling more myself now with a fresh cut and colour, thanks to my longtime stylist Sophie at Le Bigoudi.

I feel so lucky that both Paul and I have been healthy through this time, that I've been able to continue working, and that even though life has been stressful, things are mostly okay. One thing I've missed has been self care. I've determined that maybe self care looks different during this time (more time at home, more naps, more walks with podcasts, more phone chats with friends) but I've missed lots of things that used to help me unwind and make me feel good. Things like haircuts, manicures, brunches, outings with friends, travelling, seeing theatre and probably many others that I can't count.

Getting a haircut felt really good. I feel more put together. It gives me some more options day to day. And seeing Sophie was a delight. Also, that feeling of someone else washing your hair with 10x more care than you ever would! I know that this small thing had a big impact on my mental health and for that I'm grateful. Toronto entered phase 3 on Friday, and while I'm remaining cautious and careful, I hope that being able to do some of these self care things a bit more regularly!  

Tell me about your self care during quarantine. How has it changed? How are you feeling?

Sunday Diaries

How do you find new music to listen to?

When I was younger, I loved attending concerts, listening to the radio, and buying the CDs of the new artists I loved. (Yes, CDs. And cassettes before that when I was really young) Somewhere in the last 10 years I stopped actively discovering new music, and kept listening to stuff I had previously enjoyed. Even now, I still find myself listening to albums and artists that are familiar instead of seeking out new things to listening to. 

This weekend Paul and I went down a bit of a rabbit hole, and found ourselves listening to a lot of music from the Eurovision Song Contest. This kind of started after we watched the Eurovision Song Contest movie and started talking more about the actual Eurovision Song Contest. Eurovision isn't something that I've followed actively over the years (though my best friend Mel has spoken about it with great enthusiasm) and this meant we had a lot of learning to do. We listened to the winners of the contest over the last few decades, and also enjoyed a playlist of songs from the 2019 contest. 

Our exploration led us to learn about Dadi Freyr and the song Think About Things, which was Iceland's entry for Eurovision this year. I think this may be my new favourite song and I'm sort of obsessed with learning the dance moves! The contest/shows were unfortunately cancelled this year due to COVID-19, but that didn't diminish our enjoyment of this song, and the rest of the entries for 2020. 

While Eurovision may only be once a year (and some of the songs may not be my jam) I think I may have been converted to a fan of the contest, and may follow it more closely it in the years to come. For now, it gave me some fun internet research to do and a whole lot of new to me music to listen to (and dance moves to master).

Sunday Diaries

A few weeks ago I saw an interview with the founders of Souk Bohemian, and immediately fell in love with everything in their shop. I learned that Vanessa and Morgan had curated a book, and after seeing all the beautiful photography on their site, I knew I needed to own it.

View this post on Instagram

“Devour it in small pieces. Savor its moments. Relish in its journeys.” Page 7 of @brownbohemians encourages you how to wander through this incredible book curated by @thebazaarbohemian, and since I received my copy I’ve been trying to do just that. The photos and stories are moving and stunning. Their stories weave together to talk about identity, emotion, perspective, power, creativity and so much more. It’s easy to immerse yourself and get lost in these pages. I can’t wait to continue to devour these stories in the days, weeks, and months to come.

A post shared by ashley gibson ✨ (@ashleydtl) on Jul 19, 2020 at 2:49pm PDT

The book is called Brown Bohemians and I'm absolutely in awe with all that's gone into this incredible coffee table book. I'm excited to keep making my way through these moving stories and incredible photos. 

Does your computer background stay the same or change on the regular? I like to change mine up regularly, and love that there's a few sites who share monthly backgrounds with pretty options. For the last couple months I've been choosing backgrounds from The Every Girl, and they always bring me joy when I start up my laptop. 

Any Drag Race fans out there? I've been loving All Stars 5 and Canada's Drag Race. On AS5 I'm definitely #TeamShea, but would be happy with a Jujubee win as well. For Canada's Drag Race, it's been a lot of fun to see some Toronto queens that I've seen and loved live (like Priyanka and Scarlett Bobo) as well as learn more about other awesome queens from across Canada like Jimbo and Ilona Verley. I'm glad that even though All Stars will be done soon, I'll still have Canada's Drag Race to enjoy for the rest of the summer (and then I'll go back to re-watching old seasons like I always do...)

Happy Sunday, loves xo

PS. After filming this video a week ago, I finally got around to editing it! Check out how I did on Poshmark in June (and if you watch til the very end you'll see how badly I need a new tripod for my phone...any suggestions?)

Sunday Diaries

The Baby-Sitters Club books were some of my absolute favourites growing up. I loved that world, and couldn't get enough of the their stories. When I saw that Netflix had released a new BSC series, I was excited but a bit apprehensive. I worried that it would take the magic away, and wouldn't live up to the special memories I had of their friendship, challenges, and babysitting adventures. Thankfully my worries were for nothing, because I think they knocked it out of the park with the series. It pays homage to the original, with some lovely updates for a 2020 world. Also: Alicia Silverstone plays Kristy's mom! I also loved the addition of 'The Claudia Kishi Club' documentary, which chronicles the profound impact cool girl Claudia had for Asian representation. I really hope that The Baby Sitters Club gets a second season so I can keep enjoying the incredible nostalgia and heart it brings.

Speaking of storytelling, I subscribed to what may become my very favourite newsletter this week. I've had the opportunity to see Chantaie and her work in action, and she is an expert when it comes to the art/science of telling stories. I can't wait to get another edition, and if you're interested in storytelling, you'll enjoy learning from Chantaie's perspective.

My queue of podcasts keeps filling up, but without a regular commute I need to find new & different pockets of time to listen to them. I went to the optometrist this week, and in my travels listened to this meaningful conversation on resilience and showing up for anti-racism with Komal Minhas and Jam Gamble. I loved this quote from Jam:

"That is what community is. When we talk about women supporting and empowering women, this is what it looks like. Amplifying voices that are not yours. Amplifying stories that you have not lived, but deserve to be shared. It’s not just about saying #girlpower. It’s also amplifying those voices and clapping and saying: I see you, I hear you. I appreciate you. And that gives someone the courage to just press on in ways they never knew they could."

This week I was also reminded of this important mantra that Brene Brown shared. 

I am not here to be right. I am here to get it right. Such an important distinction and idea to reflect on.  

In 4 weeks of writing these weekly posts, I still haven't figured out how to end them. Do I summarize things I shared above? Tell you about something happening this week? Just kind of end abruptly and be done with it? 

Maybe I'll get it right in week 5. Until then, friends xo