A day for Moms

I hope all of the mothers out there have had a lovely day. 

I find mother's day to be incredibly challenging and sometimes I don't even realize it. A few weeks ago I was feeling crummy and frustrated and lacking in the self love department and I think sub-consciously a lot of it had to do with the fact that Mother's Day was approaching. I often have a challenging time around various dates relating to my mother: mother's day, her birthday (November 11), and her death anniversary (February 24). I'm feeling a lot better as of this weekend and I'm happy that I've learned to listen to my body, manage my emotions in non-food ways and talk to people about my feelings rather than ball them up inside (even when I don't know exactly what I'm feeling!) 

My mother was a beautiful woman and I'm so happy to call myself her daughter. She was always very loving and affectionate and did her best to give me the best childhood she could. She encouraged me to follow my dreams and put me in Brownies, Girl Guides, dance lessons and various school activities. She was at every event cheering me on and supporting me. My parents split up for a year when I was 5 and my mom and I lived together in Belleville, Ontario. She worked really hard to make sure that I had everything and I think we grew even closer as a result of that time that we spent together. 

I miss my mom every day that she isn't here and it scares me that over the next couple of years I will have spent more time on earth without her than with her. I know that her death helped to shape me into the person that I am today and I know that she's somewhere looking out for me and cheering me on from the best seat in the house in all of my endeavours. I hope that she is proud of me and I hope that she knows how much I love her. 

Happy Mother's Day Mom. 

2 comments:

Jessica said...

Oh Ashley. I had no idea you were having a tough time. I hadn't seen much of you on the boards and I figured you were just busy. You are such a beautiful person inside and out and I know your mom would be SO proud of you!

Hope you are well :)

Bee said...

Ash!
I know how you are feeling and how hard it can be. You have come so far in your life, and beaten every challenge that you have crossed, and I am sure that your mom is smiling at what a wonderful person you have become and how many people in this world that you have inspired.

Love you!