I forgot the words to my first song.
I wait backstage fro 21 pages before making a grand entrance. I then act in a scene with the reporters and perform my first song "Stereophonic Sound". About three quarters of the way through the song I forgot the words. I remembered where I was going and what I needed to be doing but there were no sounds coming out of the my mouth. I recovered after about 3-4 lines of the band playing solo with me wiggling center stage, but I had a lot of trouble forgiving myself. I made my exit at the end of the song and stormed backstage while fighting off tears. I managed to get through the rest of the show without any problems, but on the inside I was beating myself up. There was a giant cookie made for the cast backstage and proceeded to nibble at it throughout the show. I went home and cried to Joey for an hour after the show about what a terrible performer I am and how I couldn't believe that I had made such a horrible error on opening night in front of 200+ people.
I had to get back up there Friday night to do the show again. I reminded myself of the week's meeting topic and remembered what I've learned as a Lifetime Member.
The Helpful Habits aren't just habits to utilize for weight loss; they can be used effectivelyl in our everyday lives. The two main habits I employed on Friday night (and Saturday night) were Manage Your Thoughts and Manage Your Feelings.
I really needed to manage my thoughts and replace those negative thoughts with positive ones. Ridding yourself of negative thoughts is not an easy task, so I used Positive Self Talk to assist. Before making any entrance in my show I reminded myself that I was a good performer, that I was prepared and that the audience was going to love the show. I repeated these thoughts over and over again (between warming up and running through the words to my songs). This proved to be a successful exercise and allowed me to feel confident and be myself on stage. I sang all the words to all my songs both nights.
By managing my thoughts I was also able to better manage my feelings. On Thursday night I tried to use the cookie to make me feel better. It didn't. In fact it made me feel worse. I haven't been eating refined sugar for quite a few weeks now and by eating the cookie I threw out everything I hade been working on. By using positive self talk and managing my thoughts on Friday night, I was a lot less stressed out and upset and generally felt better about myself. I didn't feel the need to reach for food and made sure I had a healthy snack for when I actually felt hungry. I recognized that my behavior from the previous night was due to my emotions.
It's important to remember that we're constantly working on these habits and that eventually they will become permanant behaviors. They will apply to your weight loss as well as your life in general regardless of where you are in your journey. Even as a Lifetime Member who has been doing the program for nearly three years and leading for over a year, I am constantly working on building these habits.
I'm off to the theatre now. I'll be repeating my mantra and getting my positive self talk going on the way there. I'm also going to remind myself of my own advice - that everyone makes mistakes and that I should view them as feedback and not failure. Nobody died because I forgot the words. I don't even know how many people noticed. Life will go on regardless of what happens in the show, but I will leave feeling positive and happy with my performance.
"Motivation is what gets your started. Habit is what keeps you going" - Jim Ryun